Five very dignified women, ladies in every sense of the word and of a past era, were laid to rest this past week (April 22-26, 2002). Speaking to the families of Gweneth Blache-Fraser, Vera Carter, Mona Quesnel, Theresa "Tessie" Williams and Eyrmyntrude Clarke was a surreal experience. It was extremely difficult to compress these five lives, each of which spanned seventy-five years and over, into a few paragraphs. And so I have tried to highlight the many similarities in the patterns of their lives, for example, three of them had connections with the President's House, two of them went to Mass every day, and yet another two were born in Grenada. But what stands out is the common denominator in the lives of the five women: Their great love for God and family.
The first to be laid to rest at Laperyouse Cemetery after a funeral service at All Saints Anglican Church, on Monday was Gweneth Blache Fraser (nee Kent), who was born 87 years ago in St Patrick's Grenada. Gwen was one of the first boarders at Bishop Anstey High School in Port of Spain. Her vocational training was completed in England and Switzerland. Returning to Trinidad in 1940, the very pretty and stately Gwen met her future husband, Louis, while attending Mass at All Saints Church, and married him in 1942. A union which produced four children, Robert, Caryl, Douglas and Yvonne who died at age nine months, seven grandchildren who adored her and whom she in turn spoiled and indulged, and one great grandchild.
Says son Robert in the eulogy "there is no doubt that my mother was an asset to my father throughout his career in the Trinidad and Federal Governments, not just in the social sense, but as the home manager in all senses of the word. She encouraged him throughout his career and knew when to be a single parent when Dad was pre- occupied." Yet Gwen found time to be active in the Heart and Chest Association, the YWCA, the Dolly Beckles School for Children and the Coterie of Social Workers. She founded the Victoria League and was for a period the patron of the All Saints Mothers' Union, and a member of the board of the Bishop's Junior School for many years.
Vera Angela Carter, was the next of this now endangered species of gracious women to be buried at Laperyouse Cemetery on Tuesday after a Funeral Mass at the Church of the Assumption on Long Circular Road. Born on September 29, 1925, the fifth child of the late Dr Joseph Hamilton Carter and his wife, Matilde, Vera attended Bishop Anstey High School, and worked at T Geddes Grant as a secretary for her entire career. As a young stenographer at the same company in 1959/60, I always admired the soft-spoken lady with the beautiful skin and smile who sat outside the office of director, Gordon Taylor's inner office. Vera's youngest sibling and only brother, Emanuel Carter, has served as President of the Senate and acting President of the Republic.
Having never been married, Vera's life centered around caring for her mother until she died on May 2,1978. In the eulogy, nephew Gerard Granado described his beloved aunt as "a person who loved her garden." Hers was a beautiful flower garden at No 43 Jerningham Avenue in Belmont where she spent her childhood into adulthood, before moving to Maraval in retirement. Vera's life was the church and family, which included her brothers, sisters, 15 nieces and nephews, their 26 offspring, and her three godsons.
Says her niece Paula Granado "Auntie Vera had a specific love for God, was a daily communicant and a Tertiary of the Dominican Order of Lay People. For every little aspect of life, she had a prayer which she would offer." One of her favourite sayings was "the world can quicker do without the sun than without the celebration of the Eucharist." Ironically, it was while dressing to attend early morning Mass that Vera collapsed and died.
As the lives of these women interacted even in death, Vera's body and that of her Bishop's classmate, Tessie Williams, lay in adjacent chapels at Clark and Battoo funeral home, last week. While as a youngster she attended a private school run by Lady Clarke's mother in law.
Mona Quesnel and Tessie Williams, neighbours at Maracas Valley, St Joseph, died within hours of each other last week Saturday night. Mona Quesnel (nee Scott), the only one of the five to have been cremated, after a Funeral Mass at noon on Tuesday at the Assumption Roman Catholic Church, was according to daughter-in-law Gillian "faithful to her husband, church and God." Having married Maurice Quesnel, the former managing director of Cannings, 55 years ago at age 21, Mona devoted her life to taking care of her seven children Christian, Jeanine, Leslie Anne (deceased), Peter, Kathy, Rachael and Mary-Ellen. And for the past 25 years worked two days per week with the Living Water Community. Says Jeanine "that was my mother, she always reached out to people on the fringe of society; those we try to avoid she reached out to them."
As a mother, this elegant woman was faithful to all her children whom she treated equally. And she was very proud of her 14 grandchildren and two great grandchildren who were her life. To one of her sons she was "Queenie." While to one adult granddaughter "Granny was everything."
Maurice and Mona Quesnel would have been married for 55 years this June, and were the proud recipients of a Papal Blessing on their golden anniversary five years ago. Like Vera Carter, Mona went to church everyday of life.
I met Tessie Williams (nee Tang) 48 years ago when I worked with her husband Michael in his father's company on what was then Marine Square. She would have been about 27 years old, was charming with a beautiful smile, and always showed a great deal of interest in chatting with the staff when she came into L. J. Williams. In the 1980's our relationship grew stronger when her husband became President of the Senate and as a social reporter I would meet her, still always smiling, at the many social functions this very private and laid-back woman attended with her beloved Michael. With Tessie at his side, Michael Jay Williams, as acting President of the Republic, hosted the inauguration ceremony of President Noor Hassanali in 1987. Then in 1999 my relationship with Tessie came full circle when our two youngest children were married.
There was therefore a sense of great loss when Tessie was buried at Mucurapo Cemetery after a Funeral Mass on Wednesday at the Assumption Roman Catholic Church. Tessie and Michael met and fell in love while he was still at St Mary's College, got married, and as their children can testify "truly lived their marriage vows spoken almost fifty years ago." They would have celebrated their golden wedding anniversary on May 6, 2002, Tessie would have been 75 years on May 8. The union produced eleven children, Gerard, David, Pauline, Richard and Peter, Kathie, Helen, Joanne, Janice, Marion and Christopher and 27 grandchildren.
Described by her children, David and Marion, as "a modest person" who did not want to be eulogized, Tessie grew up in Belmont secure in the love of her mother Juanita, father James, older brother Al and younger brother Dave, a medical doctor who came from Germany to be with her at the end.
When Michael started his businesses, Century Elson Limited, and later Spancrete, Tessie's support was integral to both, never complaining about the long hours of mothering while he worked long days and nights to establish the businesses. The early years were hard and her children attest to having witnessed her personal sacrifice which continued later on when she would visit many job sites with her beloved husband.
As a mother, Tessie didn't spare the rod to spoil the child. "Mummy did a lot of talking to us for sure, but mostly taught us by example. Mum's idea of beauty was clear - it was from within! She never used a speck of make-up and only in later years did she occasionally use a touch of face cream and some chapstick. Her confidence was born of a conviction that our purpose in this life was to be pleasing to God and she did this with a combination of simplicity, intellect and originality."
Former first lady, Eyrmyntrude Clarke, wife of former Governor General and President, Sir Ellis Clarke, was buried at Laperyouse Cemetery on Friday after a funeral service at All Saints Anglican Church. The church where for 40 years I would see this very staunch Anglican at worship, nearly every Sunday, while her husband remained a devout Roman Catholic.
Born into the Hagley family of St George's Grenada, on March 7, 1921, she met Trinidadian barrister-at-law Ellis Clarke who was on a visit to Grenada and married him almost fifty years ago on June 28, 1952, then came to live in Trinidad. The union produced one son, Peter, a daughter, Margaret Ann, and five grandchildren. In the words of her daughter-in-law Suzanne: "Her entire life was family and her grandchildren. She was the perfect grandmother, loving, caring and spoiling my three sons, John Peter, Michael and David" who live a few minutes away from their grandparents. The two others, Alexander and Katarina, live in England.
When her husband moved out of private practice to the position of Solicitor General , followed by the post of Constitutional Advisor to the Cabinet, and Attorney General, and then chose to be Ambassador to the United States and Trinidad & Tobago's representative to the United Nation, rather than be appointed Chief Justice of the country, this very private woman with her very traditional ideas of what a wife and mother should be comfortably accepted it all as being her role in married life. And then quietly went about the business of being the first lady of Trinidad and Tobago as wife of the Governor General of Independent Trinidad & Tobago from January 1973, and then the President of the Republic from 1976 to March 1987.
Says Suzanne "maybe there were certain aspects of the hectic social life that she did not like, especially being in the limelight, but she did enjoy it because she saw it as a very important role as his wife. She was supportive, loving and very strong behind the scenes, but never submissive. She got delight in her husband and children's delight. Family was so important to her that we had family dinner every Sunday night and for her that was the highlight of the week." "She was loving and caring with a capital 'C', all she wanted to do was to make sure everybody was happy. There was not a selfish bone in her body."